i often allude to what it is like to live overseas, but i have never really sat down and fully explained how different life outside the comforts of the united states really is. yesterday i was walking behind a well to-do woman who was probably in her 30's and who was wearing bright pink pants (at least 2 sizes too small) with a pink and purple ribbed turtleneck. and at first it barely phased me. then i began to reflect on how this completely ridiculous and inappropriate outfit barely caused me to blink, which in turn led me to think about how different bolivia is, which in turn led me to think how different my life is. yes, it's amazing what can cause me to go into deep reflective mode!
if i tried to write every way in which life is different or in which i have changed from living overseas, this blog would soon turn into a book so today i will just focus on some of the more superficial and usually amusing differences. for example, to go back to the lady with the pink pants, bolivia is about 20 years behind in fashions. if you are a lover of the 80s, come do your shopping in bolivia. as i was walking behind this lady i realized i really have no idea what is in fashion in the states. when i am home, i might buy a few items here or there, but the majority of my wardrobe really hasn't changed too much in the last 3 years. now this is not to say that everyone here looks like they stepped out of a molly ringwald film. actually i'm also daily surrounded by aymaran women in traditional dress (full skirts, shawls, and the famous bowler hats). i must admit, though, that there is something freeing in not feeling the pressure to constantly be chasing trends.
another somewhat amusing (although at times annoying) thing i've come to learn about life in bolivia is that all foods have a season, not just fruits and vegetables. for example, pretzels are about to go out of season, black beans are just now coming back into season after a 6 month time off, and basil has disappeared from all but the biggest grocery stores. i've learned to make do with what you can get here, only packing the essentials like peanut butter and chocolate chips (although i can never pack enough to last through the entire year). there are times when the grocery stores get large shipments of imports from the states and one aisle is dedicated to things like cheerios, campbell's soup, betty crocker mixes, frosting, and chex mix. we gringos walk down this aisle longingly and often get quite excited about something like a can of cream of mushroom soup. it struck me the other day that people back home will never understand the excitement and joy one can of soup can bring and probably would think that we are crazy if they saw us walking down this aisle....unless they have ever lived overseas. however, as excited as we get over the box of cheerios or the heinz ketchup, most of these things will remain on the shelf as we cannot bring ourselves to pay $20 for a box of special K or $6 for a bag of chex mix. we might splurge on one special treat and then it's back to bolivian drinkable yogurt and maraqueta bread.
like i said, things like fashions and food are really superficial differences, however they can still teach us important lessons about how we really can survive without the latest material possession. i have learned to live on less and am starting to get to the point where american grocery stores and clothing stores overwhelm me when i first walk in. i know when i move back to the states, whenever that is, it will be hard to not fall right back into the trap of always chasing the latest fashions, and taking the many choices on the grocery store shelves for granted. however, i hope the lessons i am learning here will stick with me and i will always be reminded of this time that has been so full of joy even without all the stuff we so often think we need.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Monday, October 13, 2008
backpacking- check
i did it. i survived a backpacking trip. i walked almost 20 miles with a heavy pack, with quite a bit of up hill at 13,800 feet. i slept outside. i went without a shower or any indoor plumbing. i was dirty, tired, sore, and sunburned. but i survived and now can check that off the life list! and with the exception of slightly sore legs and a horrendous sunburn (my nose is horribly blistered!), i feel pretty good. i actually enjoyed myself, most of the time.
the first day we drove to copacabana, a chill, little city on the shore of Lake Titicaca. after lunch in the plaza, we headed out. we walked about 10 miles to the end of the peninsula. it was a nice walk, although the constant stopping and complaining of the high school boys made it a bit long. however, i eventually walked ahead of them, and enjoyed some nice chats with some of the other female teachers. as we approached camp, the sun was setting over the lake and it was like the reward for persevering and making it thus far. as hot as the day had been, the night was freezing and after adding many layers back on, we enjoyed a time around the camp fire, eating a delicious dinner ( i discovered that camp food, when prepared by an expert, is really incredible!) and just chatting, before heading to bed early.
the next morning we woke up early, packed up camp, and took a boat out to the Isla del Sol (Island of the Sun). we hiked from the south side of the island to the north side, most of the time on an incan trail. we had been anticipating a good 6-7 hour hike, however, we were pleasantly surprised to find ourselves at our next campsite after only about 4 hours or so. we camped on the beach and were able to enjoy a lazy afternoon, laying on the beach, napping, and playing cards. we spent some quiet time alone, watching the sunset and reflecting on what the Lord had been teaching us throughout the trip. it never ceases to amaze me the more i do outdoorsy stuff, how many analogies for the christian life you can make. if you are a regular reader of this blog, or have talked to me at all in the past couple of months, you know i have been learning a lot about joy and finding and focusing on joy, rather than troubles. the Lord used this hike as another opportunity to remind me about looking for joy. many times i would be so focused on the path and just putting one foot in front of the other that i would forget to look around at the breathtaking views that surrounded me. the bluest water that sparkled like diamonds, the snow covered mountains in the distance, the green islands across the lake. (look for some amazing pictures soon on facebook!) how many times in our life, are we so focused on just getting through the day, that we forget to stop and look for the joy the Lord has put in our lives? we should be joy-seekers, remembering to take our eyes off the path and look around at the amazing views the Lord has given us.
the final day involved only about an hour of hiking and then another hour on a boat back to the mainland, before we caught the bus back to la paz. all in all, it was a good trip. at times it was hard, especially climbing the hills in the altitude with a cold (catching your breath at 13000 feet is hard enough, then add in walking uphill with a stuffy nose and it's practically impossible). i could tell my body was not completely recovered from the illness of a week ago, and i wasn't quite as strong as i normally am, but i was proud of my pace (especially in comparison to the high school boys!).
will i ever go backpacking again? i honestly don't know. it was hard, and although i enjoyed it, i am not sure i have been completely converted yet. i really don't know if i could handle a harder trail, but i do think i should perhaps like to try a similar trail when i am completely healthy and see if it is better. i would also like to sometime try a trip without the altitude and see what a difference that would make. and so while i am still a "ballerina girl", i now know i can at least pose as an outdoorsy girl for a few days, if necessary!
the first day we drove to copacabana, a chill, little city on the shore of Lake Titicaca. after lunch in the plaza, we headed out. we walked about 10 miles to the end of the peninsula. it was a nice walk, although the constant stopping and complaining of the high school boys made it a bit long. however, i eventually walked ahead of them, and enjoyed some nice chats with some of the other female teachers. as we approached camp, the sun was setting over the lake and it was like the reward for persevering and making it thus far. as hot as the day had been, the night was freezing and after adding many layers back on, we enjoyed a time around the camp fire, eating a delicious dinner ( i discovered that camp food, when prepared by an expert, is really incredible!) and just chatting, before heading to bed early.
the next morning we woke up early, packed up camp, and took a boat out to the Isla del Sol (Island of the Sun). we hiked from the south side of the island to the north side, most of the time on an incan trail. we had been anticipating a good 6-7 hour hike, however, we were pleasantly surprised to find ourselves at our next campsite after only about 4 hours or so. we camped on the beach and were able to enjoy a lazy afternoon, laying on the beach, napping, and playing cards. we spent some quiet time alone, watching the sunset and reflecting on what the Lord had been teaching us throughout the trip. it never ceases to amaze me the more i do outdoorsy stuff, how many analogies for the christian life you can make. if you are a regular reader of this blog, or have talked to me at all in the past couple of months, you know i have been learning a lot about joy and finding and focusing on joy, rather than troubles. the Lord used this hike as another opportunity to remind me about looking for joy. many times i would be so focused on the path and just putting one foot in front of the other that i would forget to look around at the breathtaking views that surrounded me. the bluest water that sparkled like diamonds, the snow covered mountains in the distance, the green islands across the lake. (look for some amazing pictures soon on facebook!) how many times in our life, are we so focused on just getting through the day, that we forget to stop and look for the joy the Lord has put in our lives? we should be joy-seekers, remembering to take our eyes off the path and look around at the amazing views the Lord has given us.
the final day involved only about an hour of hiking and then another hour on a boat back to the mainland, before we caught the bus back to la paz. all in all, it was a good trip. at times it was hard, especially climbing the hills in the altitude with a cold (catching your breath at 13000 feet is hard enough, then add in walking uphill with a stuffy nose and it's practically impossible). i could tell my body was not completely recovered from the illness of a week ago, and i wasn't quite as strong as i normally am, but i was proud of my pace (especially in comparison to the high school boys!).
will i ever go backpacking again? i honestly don't know. it was hard, and although i enjoyed it, i am not sure i have been completely converted yet. i really don't know if i could handle a harder trail, but i do think i should perhaps like to try a similar trail when i am completely healthy and see if it is better. i would also like to sometime try a trip without the altitude and see what a difference that would make. and so while i am still a "ballerina girl", i now know i can at least pose as an outdoorsy girl for a few days, if necessary!
Thursday, October 9, 2008
the life list
over the past two years i have thought a lot about my "life list". the list of things i want to do at some point of my life. i have never actually written this list down, but several things are just floating around in my head. things i must do. nothing too original. things like learn how to surf, go parasailing, visit all 6 inhabited continents (if i could somehow jet over to antarctica for an hour, i would, but i don't really feel the desire to stay there for any time at all). other less adventurous things, but probably more fulfilling, are also on the list, like fall in love, and be a good wife and mother.
this weekend i am finally going to get to cross something off the list. go on a backpacking trip. i added this last year when i realized that i could not live in south america for 3 years without ever going on one of the famous backpacking trips with our high schoolers. so this weekend i am gritting my teeth and biting the bullet, strapping a pack on, walking for hours each day along the lake titicaca, and sleeping outside, all without showers or indoor plumbing. haha. i am excited and nervous all at the same time. we shall see how this goes. look for a report next week!
this weekend i am finally going to get to cross something off the list. go on a backpacking trip. i added this last year when i realized that i could not live in south america for 3 years without ever going on one of the famous backpacking trips with our high schoolers. so this weekend i am gritting my teeth and biting the bullet, strapping a pack on, walking for hours each day along the lake titicaca, and sleeping outside, all without showers or indoor plumbing. haha. i am excited and nervous all at the same time. we shall see how this goes. look for a report next week!
Saturday, October 4, 2008
he never said it would be easy
driving up to community group tonight, the sky was painted a brilliant orange. having been sick for the past week and unable to even get out of bed, i had not really seen the outdoors, much less taken pleasure in god's creation. the fiery orange sky was like a welcome back present. welcome back, ashlyn, to the outside world, we've missed you.
our bodies often give us signs to tell us we need to slow down, we are doing too much. my body decided instead, to just come to a screeching stop. i was bedridden for a week. horrible fevers racked my body, leaving me huddled under mountains of blankets, unable to get warm, feeling as though my insides were shaking to pieces. in the hours when one fever had broken and before the next one came, i would just lay in bed trying to sleep, or maybe watching a movie. walking from my bed to my bathroom (probably about 10 feet away) was a huge feat. at one low point, after being sick, i laid on the bathroom floor, lacking any strength to get back to my bed. i missed an entire week of school, and until today, didn't even care. (if you know me at all, you know that is saying a lot...i DON'T miss school) i was also homesick like i've never been before. i watched many of my mom's and my favorite movies (anne of green gables, pride and prejudice, little women) and not only did these make me miss my mom, they also seem to take place a lot in fall and early winter, both times of the year that i love and that i miss terribly.
however, today was a new day. the third day of antibiotics and wow, what a difference! while still lacking some energy from going a week without eating, i feel so much better. i ventured out to community group tonight, unable to face another night alone in my apartment. and what a blessing it was. to worship among a group of people who have also stepped out on a faith to follow the Lord to a far, distant land is a special thing. there is a special bond you have with these people. they understand that life in a foreign country is difficult, and that being sick when so far from home is harder than anyone could imagine. they become your family. and i have been blessed with a wonderful one. as i lifted my voice up to our Lord, i couldn't help but think what a truly blessed life i do have. i get to live in this breathtakingly beautiful country, doing the Lord's work daily, surrounded by amazing brothers and sisters in Christ. so while life overseas is challenging and hard, the reward is so much greater than anything you can imagine!
our bodies often give us signs to tell us we need to slow down, we are doing too much. my body decided instead, to just come to a screeching stop. i was bedridden for a week. horrible fevers racked my body, leaving me huddled under mountains of blankets, unable to get warm, feeling as though my insides were shaking to pieces. in the hours when one fever had broken and before the next one came, i would just lay in bed trying to sleep, or maybe watching a movie. walking from my bed to my bathroom (probably about 10 feet away) was a huge feat. at one low point, after being sick, i laid on the bathroom floor, lacking any strength to get back to my bed. i missed an entire week of school, and until today, didn't even care. (if you know me at all, you know that is saying a lot...i DON'T miss school) i was also homesick like i've never been before. i watched many of my mom's and my favorite movies (anne of green gables, pride and prejudice, little women) and not only did these make me miss my mom, they also seem to take place a lot in fall and early winter, both times of the year that i love and that i miss terribly.
however, today was a new day. the third day of antibiotics and wow, what a difference! while still lacking some energy from going a week without eating, i feel so much better. i ventured out to community group tonight, unable to face another night alone in my apartment. and what a blessing it was. to worship among a group of people who have also stepped out on a faith to follow the Lord to a far, distant land is a special thing. there is a special bond you have with these people. they understand that life in a foreign country is difficult, and that being sick when so far from home is harder than anyone could imagine. they become your family. and i have been blessed with a wonderful one. as i lifted my voice up to our Lord, i couldn't help but think what a truly blessed life i do have. i get to live in this breathtakingly beautiful country, doing the Lord's work daily, surrounded by amazing brothers and sisters in Christ. so while life overseas is challenging and hard, the reward is so much greater than anything you can imagine!
Saturday, September 27, 2008
thoughts
My heart is filled by You.
I seek Your joy daily
and I am filled
by Your great love for Your children.
You have taken me from a safe home
and brought me to this foreign place.
You have stayed with me through the dark times
and filled my heart with peace.
You have used me in ways
I could never have imagined.
You have placed magnificent mountains around me
as a reminder of Your majesty.
You have painted sunsets of orange and pink across the sky
as a reminder of Your beauty.
My heart is filled by You
I see Your joy daily.
I seek Your joy daily
and I am filled
by Your great love for Your children.
You have taken me from a safe home
and brought me to this foreign place.
You have stayed with me through the dark times
and filled my heart with peace.
You have used me in ways
I could never have imagined.
You have placed magnificent mountains around me
as a reminder of Your majesty.
You have painted sunsets of orange and pink across the sky
as a reminder of Your beauty.
My heart is filled by You
I see Your joy daily.
Monday, September 22, 2008
a picnic at a glacier
it is incredible how i have lived here in la paz for over 2 years and i can still have days that take my breath away. today was such a day. i was invited to accompany my new zealand friends to the ice caves, and although i had a huge pile of work to do and i had not touched it all weekend, i decided that i needed to get away more than i needed to do work. so i accepted.
i woke up early this morning and bundled up...long underwear and all! we set off on our adventure that began with a 2 hour drive out of the city, in places where the word "road" is used loosely. we finally came to a place where the "road" ended and we all climbed out of the truck. we were greeted by the sight of a sparkling lake in front of a what looked like a snowy mountain, but really it was a glacier. And although this was beautiful, we were actually afraid the ice caves were no more. The snow and ice had receeded a lot since the last time my friends were there, and they were not sure if the ice caves would still exist. for those of you skeptical of global warming, it really is having an effect on our earth, today was proof of that. however, it also was the end of the dry season, so it had not snowed in months. but not willing to admit defeat, the 5 kiwis (including a 3 month old baby) and I set out on a hike to the start of the snow. it took a couple of hours and while not extremely hard, walking even slightly (and at some places, more than slightly) up hill at 15,000 ft can still take your breath away. or leave you "puffed", to use a new term i learned today. the terrain was something right out of lord of the rings. picture the scene where aragorn, legolas, and gimli meet the horsemen of rohan. that is the barren land i walked over today. surrounded by mountains on all sides, i couldn't help but feel i had been transported out of reality and into a magical world where anything could happen. when we finally arrived at the snow, we discovered that while they had shrunk significantly, the ice caves were still there. we hurried to put back on all the layers we had shed during the hike and then sat down to enjoy a small picnic lunch at the foot of the glacier. climbing into the ice caves was another magical experience. looking up, the ceiling of the cave is solid ice, sparkling blue and crystal, with rocks large and small embedded into it. i can't find the words to describe what it is like to be standing under a magnificent glacier, except that it is absolutely incredible. you feel so tiny, so insignificant. the walk back was much easier, being all downhill. and during the ride back i had the joy of holding baby maya in the back of the truck during the rather, shall we say bumpy, ride. she slept most of the way, but everytime we hit an especially big bump she would grab my finger tightly. i was thinking of how i had just witnessed this magnificent glacier, an example of the grandness of god, and here in my arms, i was now holding another example of god's greatness, but this time it came in a much tinier package. if the same god who created that glacier could also create this tiny, perfect baby, then he is more than able to handle all the little problems and troubles that have begun to overwhelm me. so, although i still have piles of work to do and i am exhausted, i needed today. i needed to be reminded that god can take care of my troubles and wants to take care of my troubles, if i will only hand them over to him.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
twila paris and full moons
Has anyone else seen that infomercial for a Christian compilation CD with Twila Paris singing the song, "God is in Control"? That is all of the song I know because that is all that is on the commercial, but since I have heard that phrase a lot in the past week, that one line is always running through my head. Last night, a friend directed me to a youtube video of that song and it was quite.....entertaining. Gotta love cheesy 80's videos. However I still think the overall sentiment expressed by the song is true and something I need to remember. Especially now.
I am at a point where I have no choice but to believe that He is in control and trust Him. There is nothing like the country you live in being on the brink of civil war to make you trust God more than you ever have before. While some might panic and become full of fear at the chaos that has become Bolivia, I have approached it more with the attitude that this will all blow over soon and nothing will ever happen. Based on past experiences this very likely the case. However, at the same time, this time everything seems more real, and I have been fighting little bits of fear here and there. It really has been a very weird time. Everything is very surreal. I spend my days teaching my second graders, going to the grocery store, doing work around my apartment, and all kinds of normal, daily tasks. Yet I also check the news every 20 minutes to see if anything has changed, who has said what, where does Bolivia stand? I feel safe, yet I also am more aware of my blonde hair that immediately identifies me as a gringita.
I have become very impatient with all the uncertainity. Are things going to get better? Are these peace talks going to fix everything? or Are things going to get worse? Will I need to leave Bolivia? I don't want to leave (well, the vacation might be nice, but not under the circumstances that would have to happen to make leaving a reality), but I just want to know! And it's when I get that petulant child's attitude of I JUST WANT TO KNOW that God quietly whispers in my ear: But that is not your place to know, that is my place. Your place is live your life everyday, seeking me, and when the time is right, you will know. And I can only respond by humbly bowing my head and living.
Even in the midst of all the uncertainity, God has been faithful to reveal himself and his joy. One such revelation occured Sunday night, at perhaps the height of the fear. We were on our way to an emergency staff meeting to discuss the political situation, and my roommates and I had arrived at our destination almost 20 minutes early. While we knew we would be welcomed by the family hosting the meeting, we decided to take advantage of the time to sit in the plaza outside their house. The moon was full and HUGE. Being at 12,000 feet really changes how you see the moon and the stars, and the moon that night was incredible. We sat, basking in the moonlight, taking joy in God's awesome creation, and read passages from the Bible. We needed that time to calm ourselves before the Lord, to recognize his power over the whole situation and to remind ourselves of his faithfulness. It was a time of beauty in the midst of fear. For those of you at home reading this, please do not worry about me. God is in control. Things really are seeming to get better here, and my life is still very much normal, with just perhaps a heightened awareness of what is going on around me. Just keep praying for peace.
I am at a point where I have no choice but to believe that He is in control and trust Him. There is nothing like the country you live in being on the brink of civil war to make you trust God more than you ever have before. While some might panic and become full of fear at the chaos that has become Bolivia, I have approached it more with the attitude that this will all blow over soon and nothing will ever happen. Based on past experiences this very likely the case. However, at the same time, this time everything seems more real, and I have been fighting little bits of fear here and there. It really has been a very weird time. Everything is very surreal. I spend my days teaching my second graders, going to the grocery store, doing work around my apartment, and all kinds of normal, daily tasks. Yet I also check the news every 20 minutes to see if anything has changed, who has said what, where does Bolivia stand? I feel safe, yet I also am more aware of my blonde hair that immediately identifies me as a gringita.
I have become very impatient with all the uncertainity. Are things going to get better? Are these peace talks going to fix everything? or Are things going to get worse? Will I need to leave Bolivia? I don't want to leave (well, the vacation might be nice, but not under the circumstances that would have to happen to make leaving a reality), but I just want to know! And it's when I get that petulant child's attitude of I JUST WANT TO KNOW that God quietly whispers in my ear: But that is not your place to know, that is my place. Your place is live your life everyday, seeking me, and when the time is right, you will know. And I can only respond by humbly bowing my head and living.
Even in the midst of all the uncertainity, God has been faithful to reveal himself and his joy. One such revelation occured Sunday night, at perhaps the height of the fear. We were on our way to an emergency staff meeting to discuss the political situation, and my roommates and I had arrived at our destination almost 20 minutes early. While we knew we would be welcomed by the family hosting the meeting, we decided to take advantage of the time to sit in the plaza outside their house. The moon was full and HUGE. Being at 12,000 feet really changes how you see the moon and the stars, and the moon that night was incredible. We sat, basking in the moonlight, taking joy in God's awesome creation, and read passages from the Bible. We needed that time to calm ourselves before the Lord, to recognize his power over the whole situation and to remind ourselves of his faithfulness. It was a time of beauty in the midst of fear. For those of you at home reading this, please do not worry about me. God is in control. Things really are seeming to get better here, and my life is still very much normal, with just perhaps a heightened awareness of what is going on around me. Just keep praying for peace.
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